Why We Hate Children
Ok, I admit it. I am trying to be provocative. But it is really true.
We despise children because we despise ourselves. It is pretty simple. We don’t want them in our lives because we don’t want ourselves in our lives. Here is what happens. Children are full of dreams and aspirations and energy. When we(cultural we) look at children, we resent the fact that they are so full of optimism because we have long turned our backs on dreaming. We have given into someone’s material quest. We are surviving. We hate children because they have a process that we have lost. Dreaming. So we try to keep children excluded from society. They are more like nuisance than a joy.
I would say most people spend most of their days waiting for the time when they don’t have to work anymore because their work is someone else’s dream and not their own. They certainly don’t look forward to going home to their children because then it is a double-in-your-face-I’m-not-living-my-dream existence.
If you still have dreams, you automatically love children. However, if the dreams are ambitious ones about moving up the ladder or keeping up with the neighbors, then you hate children because advancement up a ladder is not a dream. It is the pressure you feel from what someone else told you your dream should be. It is hard to not go for advancement because that is the message all around us in every type of media. But it is not dreaming. You know you are not dreaming real dreams when you hate children, when children are a pain rather than a joy, and when you would rather be at work than with your own children.
When you are dreaming your true dreams, it is because you are responding to your own positive energy from deep within you. You also automatically recognize the positive energy in children even from a very young age so you long to be around it.
You could be reading this and thinking ok I am a sell-out. I will quit what I am doing and find my real passion and do it. That would be extremely wrong. Maybe you are a doctor who always wanted to be an architect or a car mechanic. Maybe you are building houses when you would rather be a concert pianist. Don’t quit. Please don’t quit. The problem is not what we are currently doing. It never is.
The problem is the lack of dreaming. Dreaming is the ability to entertain a possibility that comes from an inward source, not an outward one. Most of society is based upon responding to outward stimulus, rather than inward ones. If you have ignored being a pianist, you don’t have to throw away the job that supports your family. You simply have to start playing the piano. When you find the love in the piano playing, it will automatically generalize in a positive way to every part of your life. You will start loving children because you are dreaming.
You don’t have to dream big to have it have a positive impact into every part of your life. You just have to do it. You can do it by asking yourself what things are attracting you to your life or what is calling to you. When you respond, you are dreaming, but don’t quit the things that support your family. The logic is simple about how this works. If you are a doctor who starts playing the piano, you are going to start listening to what resonates within your patients. If you start a program of running, then you will encourage your patients to get well by doing positive things for themselves. I think it is important to accept the reality that you are where you are by reason of who you are right now. It is just not wise to throw away responsibility to become someone different overnight.
Just start dreaming and it will be like magic and then things will change as you develop. You will start loving children.